JUNE 22ND - 10:24

so, friday night = das moustache.

once again, brilliant. me, kelly, chris, ryan, amy, richard, tom, chesca .. brilliant night. i love the das moustache ideals, a real party for real kids. they played raspberry beret, handsome devil, bigmouth strikes again and there is a light that never goes out - me chris and kelly being awful...

ended up talking to a girl who we met outside of sugarcubes, i think her name was beckie, and her friend frank...she came over to us when she heard us singing first of the gang to die at the top of our lungs whilst having a smoke....told us she's so happy that there are other people in lincoln who have good music taste...told us about how she loves her best friend but doesn't want to scare her off by telling her...i told her to absolutely do it.

got home at about 4AM - it was starting to get light when we got in, and i had a mild stomach ache...thankfully it wore off as i went to sleep though.

woke up at about 11/12 and chris and kelly went home. i stayed in lincoln and met my mum at 2.30PM, took her to the angel for coffee with collette, ryan and chesca.  it was her idea not to go to coffee aroma - i like her thinking. ended up having two or three hours of delightful banter, then went to the market to buy a phone battery. mum left, and ryan chesca and i went to blue banana so ryan could get some trendy CRIMINAL DAMAGE jeans. then went and had a 'hmv' binge that resulted in my buying absolutely nothing.

came home at around 6ish and went to elle's birthday party at around 8. left around 10.30...kelly left me to carry a crate of strongbow back to hers - so chris and i took a different route and shook all the cans to high heaven - this prevailed when a couple of 'likely lads' asked me for a can, the screams as we walked away...

yesterday i drove with kelly to witham st hughs to drop elle off, then we drove back to my house and sat around smoking in the sun all day. had a roast dinner, then sat in my room for about three hours, smoking, and talking about jazz. we both feel like something huge is going to happen in the next ten years that will completely change our lives forever...we talked about artistic integrity, mixing with the norm and avoiding false ideals...

ended up falling asleep to leonard cohen - i'm your man dvd. so many brilliant artists brought together with a mutual adoration and respect for this genius.

leonard cohen is a massive part of my life...so many beautiful words. his importance is immeasurable. 

one of my favourite leonard cohen songs is 'anthem'. it is from his 1991 album 'the future', and is musically and lyrically life affirming. this song has nurtured me through numerous instances in my life where i have suffocated, enclosed, imprisoned, questioned worth...

but 'there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in..'

'the birds they sang at the break of day.

start again, i heard them say.

don't dwell on what has passed away, or what is yet to be.

the wars, they will be fought again.

the holy dove, she will be cut again.

bought and sold and bought again, the dove is never free.

ring the bells that still can ring,

forget your perfect offering.

there is a crack in everything - that's how the light gets in.

we asked for signs, the signs were sent.

the birth betrayed, the marriage spent.

the widowhood of every government signs for all to see.

i can't run no more, with that lawless crowd.

while the killers in high places say their prayers out loud.

but they have summoned up a thunder cloud - they're gonna hear from me.

ring the bells that still can ring,

forget your perfect offering.

there is a crack in everything - that's how the light gets in.

you can add up the parts, you won't have a sum.

you can strike up the march, there is no drum.

every heart to love will come - but like a refugee. 

ring the bells that still can ring,

forget your perfect offering.

there is a crack in everything - that's how the light gets in.'

leonard cohen saved my life.